When A Veteran Passes Away: A Guide for the family left behind.

You Don’t Have to Figure Everything Out Today

Losing a Veteran or military loved one can leave a family grieving while suddenly being asked to make decisions, locate paperwork, arrange a funeral, contact government agencies, understand benefits and determine what happens next.
It can be overwhelming.

The Military Veteran Project created this guide to give surviving families a place to start.

You do not have to complete everything at once. Start with the immediate needs, gather the documents you can find, and allow organizations that specialize in military survivor support to help you navigate the rest.
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STEP 1: Gather the Veteran’s Important Documents
One of the most important documents you may need is the Veteran’s DD Form 214 (DD214) or other military separation paperwork.
The DD214 verifies military service and may be needed when applying for burial benefits, military honors, survivor benefits, and other programs.
If you cannot locate the Veteran’s DD214, you may request military service records through the National Archives and Records Administration.
Most Veterans and their next of kin can request copies of DD214s and other military service records at no cost.
Request records here:
https://www.archives.gov/veterans/military-service-records
Other documents you may want to begin gathering include:
* Certified copies of the death certificate
* DD214 or other discharge/separation documents
* Marriage certificate, if applicable
* Birth certificates for dependent children
* Social Security information
* VA correspondence or disability-rating documents
* Life insurance policies
* Military retirement information
* Banking information
* Funeral and burial receipts
* Will, trust or estate documents
Do not worry if you cannot find everything immediately. Start a folder—paper or digital—and add documents as you locate them.
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STEP 2: Contact the Department of Veterans Affairs
The VA provides several potential benefits for eligible surviving family members.
Depending on the Veteran’s service, disability status, circumstances of death and the survivor’s relationship to the Veteran, benefits may include:
* Burial and funeral allowances
* Burial in a VA national cemetery
* Government headstone, marker or medallion
* Burial flag
* Presidential Memorial Certificate
* Military funeral honors
* Dependency and Indemnity Compensation (DIC)
* Survivors Pension
* Certain accrued VA benefits
* Education benefits for qualifying spouses and children
* Bereavement counseling
Families should not assume they are—or are not—eligible. Eligibility varies, and it is worth speaking with the VA or an accredited Veterans Service Officer.
VA Family & Survivor Benefits:
https://www.va.gov/family-and-caregiver-benefits/
VA Burial & Memorial Benefits:
https://www.va.gov/burials-memorials/
VA Benefits Hotline: 800-827-1000
Keep copies of funeral and burial receipts. Some eligible individuals may receive reimbursement for certain burial, funeral, plot/interment or transportation expenses.
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STEP 3: If Your Loved One Was Serving at the Time of Death
When an active-duty service member dies, the military casualty-assistance process is different from the process following the death of a Veteran who had already separated from service.
A Casualty Assistance Officer or representative is generally assigned to eligible surviving family members following a military death.
This person can help survivors understand military benefits, documentation and the next steps.
Military branches also maintain long-term survivor programs.
For Army families, Survivor Outreach Services (SOS) provides long-term support to surviving families of deceased Soldiers.
Other military branches have their own long-term assistance programs.
Military OneSource provides information about these programs:
https://www.militaryonesource.mil/.../long-term-assistance/
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STEP 4: Connect With TAPS
One of the first organizations we encourage military and Veteran families to know about is the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS).
TAPS provides support to people grieving the death of a military or Veteran loved one, regardless of their relationship to the person who died or the circumstances surrounding the death.
Support may include:
* 24/7 survivor support
* One-to-one peer support
* Benefits and financial-resource assistance
* Grief resources
* Connections to counseling
* Support following suicide loss
* Programs for surviving spouses, parents, siblings and children
* Community and survivor events
* Education assistance and resource navigation
TAPS National Military Survivor Helpline:
800-959-TAPS (8277)
Available 24/7.
Learn more:
https://www.taps.org/survivor
Sometimes the most important thing after a military loss is simply finding another person who understands this kind of grief.
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STEP 5: Find Support for Surviving Children
When a Veteran or service member dies, the impact on their children can continue for many years.
There are organizations specifically committed to making sure children of our fallen are remembered and supported.
Gary Sinise Foundation – Families of Fallen Heroes
The Gary Sinise Foundation supports children and surviving spouses of fallen military and first-responder heroes through its Families of Fallen Heroes programming, including Snowball Express families and year-round support.
Learn more:
https://www.garysinisefoundation.org/.../honoring...
For families with children, this can provide something especially important: connection with other children who understand what it means to lose a parent who served.
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STEP 6: Look Ahead to Education
College may feel very far away when a family is dealing with a recent loss, but educational benefits and scholarships are worth documenting early.
Johnny Mac Soldiers Fund
Johnny Mac Soldiers Fund provides scholarships to Veterans and military family members, with a particular focus on children of fallen or disabled service members.
Scholarship programs have different eligibility requirements and application procedures, so families should review available programs early and keep military and survivor documentation organized.
Learn more:
https://johnnymac.org/scholarship-programs/
Also ask the VA about Survivors’ and Dependents’ Educational Assistance and other education benefits that may apply to a surviving spouse or child.
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STEP 7: Support for Gold Star Families
Robert Irvine Foundation
The Robert Irvine Foundation provides programs supporting service members, Veterans, first responders and their families.
Its Gold Star Families program provides support to families who have lost a loved one in military service, including grants designed to provide meaningful assistance to families during the holiday season.
Learn more:
https://www.robertirvinefoundation.org/.../gold-star...
Programs and eligibility can change, so families should contact the organization directly regarding current assistance.
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STEP 8: Support Specifically for Military Widows
American Widow Project
The American Widow Project provides peer-based support and community specifically for military widows.
Its mission centers on helping military widows heal and rebuild through connection, community and personal growth.
Programs include opportunities for widows to connect with others who understand military loss, virtual grief programming, retreats and other peer-based resources.
Learn more:
https://americanwidowproject.org/
It is important to note that the American Widow Project is a peer-support organization and does not provide direct financial assistance.
Sometimes support isn’t about filling out another form. Sometimes it is sitting across from someone who understands the life you had, the person you lost and the life you are now trying to rebuild.
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STEP 9: Don’t Overlook Survivor Outreach Services
For eligible Army surviving families, Survivor Outreach Services (SOS) is designed to provide long-term support.
SOS coordinators can help survivors navigate areas such as:
* Survivor benefits
* Education benefits
* Survivor Benefit Plan questions
* Financial planning
* Health benefits
* Grief resources
* Military installation access
* Long-term survivor support
Learn more through Military OneSource:
https://www.militaryonesource.mil/.../army-survivor.../
Families from other service branches should ask about their branch’s corresponding long-term survivor assistance program.
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A Simple First 90-Day Roadmap
There is no perfect timeline for grief, and families should never feel pressured to “move on.” This roadmap is simply intended to make the administrative side of loss more manageable.
First Few Days
Focus on your family and immediate funeral arrangements.
Locate the DD214 if possible.
Request certified death certificates.
Ask the funeral director about military funeral honors.
Determine whether the Veteran may be eligible for burial in a national cemetery.
Keep every receipt.
First 30 Days
Contact the VA or an accredited Veterans Service Officer.
Connect with TAPS.
Contact the appropriate military survivor or casualty-assistance program if applicable.
Review life insurance and survivor-benefit information.
Begin a folder containing every application, letter and document.
Days 30–90
Review potential VA survivor compensation and pension benefits.
Review education benefits for surviving children and spouses.
Explore organizations such as Johnny Mac Soldiers Fund and Gary Sinise Foundation for children and educational support.
Connect surviving spouses with organizations such as American Widow Project.
Explore Gold Star family programs and additional nonprofit resources.
Continue grief and peer support.
And remember: you do not have to use every resource immediately.
Some organizations may become more valuable six months from now, two years from now, or when a child begins preparing for college.
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One Important Reminder
Please do not assume that because your loved one died years after leaving the military, died from illness, died by suicide or did not die in combat that your family has no military survivor resources available.

Eligibility varies significantly from program to program.

Ask.

Apply.

Allow an accredited representative or survivor organization to help determine what may be available to your family.
A “no” from one program does not necessarily mean a “no” from another.
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From the Military Veteran Project

At the Military Veteran Project, we understand that military service doesn’t end with the person who wore the uniform.

Its impact lives within families.

When we lose a member of our military or Veteran community, there is a family left behind carrying memories, responsibilities, questions and grief.

Our goal with this resource is not to replace the Department of Veterans Affairs, casualty-assistance programs or organizations specializing in survivor services.

Our role is to help families find the right door.

Save this page.

Share it with another military family.

Print it and place it with your family’s important documents.

And if you are a Veteran reading this today, consider doing one more thing for the people you love:
Make sure they know where your DD214 and important military documents are located.
That simple step can save your family countless hours during one of the most difficult moments of their lives.

Military Veteran Project

Serving those who served and remembering the families who carry their legacy forward.

This guide is provided for general informational purposes. Benefits and nonprofit eligibility requirements vary and can change. Families should verify current eligibility and application requirements directly with the VA, Department of Defense, National Archives, or the individual nonprofit organization